Practicalities and Theories of Personality Development - in lay terms!...

There are so many different theories of personality development, it's unreal, but how do we cut through all the 'theory fog', and make practical sense of personality theories...

Maybe you've heard of the likes of Adler, Erickson, Freud, Jung, Maslow, Rank, Rogers?... No?... Don't worry about it! Basically, they're all expert psychologists who have come up with very interesting and legitimate theories of personality development...

“But, is this important to me?” I hear you ask...

Yes, V-E-R-Y, if you're interested in personal development or self improvement... and you are interested in personal development, right?... That's why you're reading this page, right?...

YES?... great, skip the next paragraph and read on. If no...

Then perhaps you're here because you're an undergraduate looking for study material on 'Theories of personality'. Well, maybe I can point you in the right direction. Click here for an array of books on theories of personality... Or here to get detailed information on theories of personality at wikipedia...

No matter what reason you are reading this page, I would certainly recommend you read on any way...

Let's focus on 2 theories

I could tell you about all the different theories of personality development, but that wouldn't quite achieve the objective of this website. For self improvement purposes, we only need to focus on two personality theories...

“ONLY two?” ... yep, two, and I suppose it could really be one. You see, I like to deal with facts, or as near fact as possible. So, any theory that's not as factual or clear-cut as 2+2 equals 4, then it's not that important for my self improvement purposes, unless, a strong, logical argument, based on fact, can be be made for it...

So let me explain my two theories of personality development...

A newborn baby, is no different to a blank canvass that's just waiting to be 'filled'...

The influence of people and experiences

Your personality development, is like a never ending portrait. This portrait has been, and continues to be, formulated behind the scenes on autopilot. Any experiences you've been through, whether directly or indirectly, will be responsible for each individual element of your portrait...

Picture this...

The amount of things a baby learns from newborn to two years old, and even beyond, is astounding. Their personality portrait is already well formed, even at this very early age... Here's just one of my theories of personality development for a baby...

At a young age, say the first few months of a babies life, a baby's only means of communicating with their parents, is to cry - who am I kidding... SCREAM the house down more like!... Now imagine this baby has problems sleeping, and needs to establish a sleep routine...

So the parents decide to try out the controversial 'Cry it out' sleep method. Basically... this is where the baby is put down for a sleep and is left to cry themselves to sleep. Promoters of this method will tell you, "It's very effective"... and maybe it is... BUT, at what cost?...

The baby will now associate crying, with being ignored, even though that's their only means of communication. In my book, that only leads to FRUSTRATION...

Ever been to a restaurant abroad where you can't speak the local language and you order a burger and chips, but instead you're given spaghetti bolognese (hmmmm, it does looks gorgeous though!)...

frustrating right? Well, it's your own fault, you should have learnt the local language before going there... I'm only joking :-), but you get my point.

Back to the baby...

What about the trust issue?... well, if they are continually left to cry as the baby gets older, they might lose trust in you. I've seen this a lot with young kids in care...

Some might say, “But it's only a baby”... well, just remember, their personality portrait is being drawn, even at this young age! So everything you say or do, even the way you say it or do it, is influencing their portrait. This becomes even more important in their later years of life...

Let's say your parents always speak to you in an aggressive manor... there's a good chance that you may grow up the same way, because you see this as the norm... You might even go on to speak to your kids the same way...

Also, it's very important to encourage kids and NEVER be too hard on them for getting something wrong, because that will help to produce a unconfident person, and so on. This process continues through out life...

But its not just parents who can have a major influence... teachers, older brothers or sisters, and basically anyone surrounded in your life, can play a part in what your personality portrait looks like...

The genetical theory

Another one of my theories of personality development, is that some of our personality traits are passed on to us genetically, from our parents...

Now I do feel that this theory is sometimes confused with what I was referring to above. For example...

Suppose your parents are aggressive people, and speak aggressively. Well you growing up around this, will probably pick up these same habits, though not necessarily through genes, more from exposure to it.

I have heard of children separated from their parents at a young age but yet still have some of the same personality traits as their mum or dad, or both. I have first hand experiences of this.

I hope I haven't bored you too much, “ZZZZzzzzzzzz”... Hey, WAKE UP! This is important stuff...

Before I wrap this up, if you haven't done so already click here and check out my foundations personality test, this really should be your starting place for your self improvement journey!.. it's FREE!

So, how do you feel about your personality portrait? Is the nose too big? or maybe too small?... Well fear not, because I have a rubber and a pencil, so you can redraw it to look the way you want it to look!

“But I can't draw, or paint”... don't worry... I'll teach you, IF, you promise NOT to fall asleep on me again :-|...

The 2 MOST true Theories

For now, just understand that the two theories of personality development that are most true, is...


The second theory, is...

Redraw your personality portrait

No matter how bad (or good - show off ;-)) you feel your personality portrait might be, you can 'rub' bits out and 'redraw' them. Obviously, some parts of your personality are easier to change than others. Also, different methods will have to be used depending on what you want to change and how deep seeded the trait might be...

For example...

I can be a bit lazy at times - the misses will tell you ALL the time, but ignore her... Women... just kidding, I love the ladies ;-)

Anyway...

When I wake up in the morning, I just like to get ready for work, which means bed spreading has to take a back seat - really it doesn't have a seat - It never gets done, and the misses is not going to have that :-(. To cut a short story even shorter, every morning I wake up the first thing I do is...

Yep, spread the bed...

Through repetition, it now comes second nature to me and it's no longer such a big effort any more... Apparently, it takes 30 days/attempts at do something repeatedly, for it to become a habit...

Maybe there's something you can change in this way also...

Spreading the bed in the morning is something very small compared to something like, controlling anger for example. For these things, a much more sophisticated approach will be required and that's hopefully where I can help you, but it does depend greatly on your belief and understanding, of the theories of personality development that we've just covered.

Moving Forward...

Hopefully, after reading this article, you understand my theories of personality development. Though I say my theories of personality development, please don't think that I'm trying to claim that I was the first to come up with them... NO! I'm simply clearing the fog of the different 'theories of personality development'.

Here's the link again to my foundations personality test, just in case you missed it earlier!

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